Eltham CC

Match Report

Match report Eltham CC Vs Old Whitgiftians CC

In what has been a quite remarkable week for sport; Usain Bolt?s world records, England on top in the Ashes (to be updated if/when we win!!), Charlton FC top of the league (albeit Division 1), it seems appropriate that instead of playing good old Footscray CC, Eltham were fixed up with a team known as the All-Stars.

As with many clubs, it seems that Footscray are struggling to get enough players to fulfil their fixtures. Still it did avoid any confusing conversations about playing Footscray CC at Footscray RFC, but in New Eltham not in Footscray, although it is in Footscray Road. You get the general idea - the Fixture Secretary's job can be tough at times!!

Anyway, we were due to play Old Whitgiftians All-Stars XI. On paper it looked like a tricky little fixture as their 1st XI play in the Surrey Championship Div 2 and have Saqlain Mustaq playing for them! We were reassured that despite their name, this team would be 4th/5th XI strength.

A bright day arrived with the most of the Eltham players still revelling in their win over the mighty Swanscombe. Skipper Swain hurried to find a quiet corner to avoid any more jibes about the Ashes; he?d already taken a lot of flak from his own boys, let alone his team mates. He won the toss and put the unknown quantity of the All Stars in to bat.

Two fresh faced openers walked to the crease to face Tanveer. As expected from such a large club, the initial exchanges were very correct, beautifully performed defensive shots or leaves - somewhat reminiscent of Wouldham in his prime (I?ll return to this shortly).

The second over from Pete Swain allowed the other opener, Robinson Jr, who apparently was nursing a post ?A? level results hangover, to smash a cover drive past Peter Fisher at point, who allowed himself a brief smile, as he momentarily led the bowling averages! The next ball was guided carefully to fine leg and flew through Tan?s legs for four more. (Wily Tan was already doing his ?I?m not a very good fielder? impersonation to lure the opposition). It looked like a long day in the field?.

Another over or two of singles, one of which was guided through the gully area by the All-Stars? number 1, Murtagh. Again, this was very reminiscent of Wouldham, leading to quiet questions in the field about the parenthood of the batsman. Was he related to Wouldham? Did Gail need to make more space in the car? Would we need a DNA test or just wait for the lofted drive over the covers to confirm our suspicions? Unfortunately, this question will remain unanswered?

Then the skipper struck the decisive blows, 3 wickets in 5 balls! Devastating and a return to the lead in the bowling averages (well deserved!) This over, as time would tell, was what really ended the game as a competition. (A bit like Broad?s spell at the Oval !!) The remainder of the batting line-up was weak and it was only a matter of time before the wickets would fall.

Tanveer bowled Murtagh with a good slower ball to avoid any more embarrassing questions about his family background, and then had Visavarga caught behind. Although it is possible that spectators may not have noticed as neither Tan nor Andy appealed for the catch. Apparently it was so obvious!

Next, the charitable Swain decided that in the interest of fair play, he would turn to spin. Seeds bowled tidily, toying with the batsmen with flight, tempting them to hit towards deep square, where Bulpitt was waiting. Fortunately no chance came his way as he was deeply engaged with deciding if it was fair to take a catch with chocolate cake in his hands. Would it be out? Or 5 runs? And what would happen to the cake? Answers to the Social Secretary on a postcard! Also at this time there were references being made that one of our fielders resembled the rather large Kiwi Jesse Ryder. Now who could that be, who was enjoying the cake? Who has been relaxing on French beaches? My lips are sealed! Anyway, Fisher bowled steadily at the other end and was rather to pleased to dump one batsman on his backside after being hit for 4. (In fairness, it was self-induced by the batsman, but it felt good!) Then Seeds picked up another wicket using his full toss ploy to trap another victim, this time LBW.

The two 12 year old batsmen continued to play well, particularly Daise who kept finding the gap between slip and wicketkeeper. Soon Seeds was replaced by Wouldham and Fisher by Mir, in an attempt to procure the last few wickets.

As the Eltham fielders crowded in, closer and closer, praying that Mir wouldn?t serve up a full toss, the ball was returned sharply amongst them back to the bowler. Tanveer wasn?t quite up to speed and missed it twice. Daise obviously was aware of this and decided to loft the next ball over Tan, safely knowing he?d get nowhere near it. And so, Tan?s ploy had worked, pretending to be a poor fielder so they hit it towards him. Anyway, catch safely pouched, he turned to celebrate with Asjad, but he wasn?t there, he was wheeling away ?aeroplane style? towards the midwicket boundary!! (Steady Asjad, it was only one wicket and a 12year old at that !!)

At the other end, Wouldham was getting more and more frustrated by the other young batsman who kept missing the ball but not being bowled. Eventually, Colin managed to get one to ?kiss? the top of off stump and Mann was on his way. Two more wickets both to catches off and the All-Stars innings was complete. All out for 74, not so much All-Stars, more like ?Magic Stars? melting in the sun. (Spot the chocolate-lover simile, Andy).

It was decided that tea would be delayed so that the game could be finished. Bulpitt and Killingley walked out to the middle. Despite a couple of mistimed shots and a close LBW shout, the pair batted well and moved the score past 50. At which point, umpire Seeds was getting worried about the sandwiches getting a little curly. But the captains decided to play on and the game continued towards an Eltham victory. Maybe because of the inevitability of the result, JK was trying to explore some of the gaps in his shot repertoire and began to try to play an on-drive to every ball. This tactic played a huge part in his downfall, when he on-drove thin air and was bowled by the impressive 12 year old Mann. In strode Page, with less than 20 to get, looking to finish it quickly. A couple of 4?s later and the end was in sight.

Bulpitt it seems could stand the pressure and was also bowled by 12 yr old Mann. Up jumped John Fisher to steer us home. Having faced one ball, he then watched as Page perished at the other end. So as Eltham batsmen hurriedly searched for pads to put on, the ever-calm! Wouldham managed to steer the ball past the slips/gully? for the two runs required for victory. Allegedly, this shot prompted the young Murtagh to question whether he had been adopted as a young child.

The All-Stars had been defeated by 7 wickets. Well played everyone, but particularly well bowled Swain, Tanveer and Wouldham. As always an enjoyable afternoon, despite on this occasion the weakness of the opposition.

Reported by Peter Fisher